Monday, May 17, 2010

Alexandria Draney

Everyone needs a Christine in their lives. The Christine in my life recently learned how to reupholster, and she asked a few acquaintances if they had any furniture she could practice on. For free. I may have knocked down a few pregnant ladies while tearing home to bring her my chair.

Everyone needs a Heather in their lives, or H² as I like to call her. That's her rapper name. Mine is J-Dawg. The Heather in my life sold me this chair for only $25.

Chair Before

She needed to rid her house of the chair because her newest little baby has huge, chubby, deliciously kissable cheeks, and they need more space to grow.

My plans were to reupholster the chair myself, which would have most likely resulted in this hot mess -


Rather, Christine saved the chair from it's fate, and she turned it into this -


I'm in love with my chair, Alexandria, which in turn makes me a bit protective. Only personages over the age of 22 are allowed to sit on her. And if you have gas, you're not allowed to occupy the same air space as Alexandria. Just kidding. Kind of. Her cushions are filled with pig hair, so if that deters you from plunking your bottom down, no hard feelings. It's probably for the best. And if you're wearing any kind of cotton, polyblend, or jean material, I'll have to ask you to sit elsewhere. Yeah, Christine told me that a cotton/polyblend/jean interaction with Alexandria may result in spontaneous combustion. Crazy, I know. I kind of think she's over reacting a bit, but better safe than sorry, right? Wow, it's all so confusing. I guess for arguments sake, let's just stick with the rule that if you're name doesn't start with a J and end with an aylee, you're living in couch city.

Alexandria and I have already been through so much together. Here she is with me back in 1948 -

vintage 1

And here she is just last night. Oh how I love her. And Doritos. And salt. It's a trifecta of love in this picture -


Christine will be teaching classes for reupholstry-inept individuals like my self. If you are interested, please leave a comment, and I'll get you in touch with her. And feel free to stop by any time to take a gander at Alexandria. But not for too long.


Rachael said...

Jaylee you are the funniest girl I know! I love that picture from 1948-you age well girl!
I am surprised you allow Doritos and their cheezy mess near her! That could result in disaster!

H said...

Are you and Christine serious? I'd love to be able to tell someone "you can sit in my newly reupholstered chair, but if you have gas please get up and do it somewhere else."

Gina said...

I love the vintage picture. I have to say the new today picture of you in the chair looks very uncomfortable with the arm of the chair behind your back. No one wearing cotton can sit there eh yet you have Doritos which can stain like crazy. Why don't you just call the chair Jaylee the 2nd?

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CaliSunshine said...

haha I have a christine in my life... a gossiping, vain one :P im digging your blog... you should come check out mine

Bridget said...

Wow that is a great chair! I love the reupholstered material! That's great!!! Where did you get the blinds back in 1948??? What is the salt for? And Clint lets you have the remote??? I never get to have the