Thursday, April 17, 2008

Tales from the lunch room

I don't particularly enjoy the narrated "I said and then she said and then I was like and then he was all......and then we were friends" posts, but I'm breaking my rule (my therapist needs to tell me why I continually preface what I'm about to say). I realize that many interesting conversations take place involving children, so it's quite natural to want to share. Today I had the pleasure of volunteering at Emma's school during their lunch hour. It was a lot of fun coupled with a lot of drama. Here are a few of my interactions with the little devils, I mean angels.

Winning 3rd place with:
3rd grade boy - "Can you tell those girls in front of me to stop turning around and burping at me?"

2nd place goes to the crying 3rd grader:
I see her from the other side of the room and I seize the opportunity to cheer her up, hoping she's just sad because her mom packed red jello instead of green. Wasn't so.
"What's wrong?" I ask.
"I blub blub blub when blub blub because blub blub wanna blub blub blub blub trouble," she blubs.
"Sorry honey, you're going to have to speak up a bit," I say.
"I'm trying blub blub because I blub blub don't blub want to be blub blub anymore," she blubs again.
At this point I bend over and put my ear up to her mouth, and I listen reeeeeal hard.
Mind you, this is a 2nd grader.
"I'm trying to make sure I don't turn into the girl that I was in the cafeteria line," she cries.
"And what type of girl was that?" I ask.
"The cafeteria lady yelled at me because I took a juice," she says.
"What's wrong with taking a juice?" I ask.
"I wasn't supposed to because I didn't pay for it," she explains.
"Well, it's okay because you didn't know you weren't supposed to take it, right?" I say.
At this point she starts wailing.
"I STOLE it and I don't want to be a stealer. I'm trying to change so I'm not a stealer anymore," she says.
"okay.....," I say, "wellllll....... can be anything you want to be if you try really hard, okay sweetie?"

1st place winning scenario -
I see a lonely 7th grade girl sitting all by herself and I go sit by her and strike up a conversation about school. I ask her about where all the other grades sit.  "The 6th graders sit here, the 7th graders sit there, and over there is where the popular kids sit," she says, rolling her eyes.  I honestly say the following - "One thing to remember is that it doesn't matter if you're popular or not. All that matters is good grades and that you did your best. Once you graduate high school, you're all alone in the world and the only thing you bring with you is your brain. It doesn't matter that you didn't get invited to sit with them at lunch, all that matters is that you apply yourself, because being popular is silly and meaningless."

cricket, cricket, cricket

"Soooooo, you weren't popular either?" she asks.

The answer was no, but I remained silent.


H said...

You did NOT say all that you crazy lunatic, did you?! Is this the way your mother acted? Is Emma growing up to be just like you?

Heather said...

I helped out in the lunch room a couple of times...I don't think I'll do it again.

Did she really ask you if you weren't a popular girl?!!!

Ed and Bel said...

The was funny! Did it bring back memories?

Jaylee Draney said...

H and Heather - My reputation as a fabricator may follow me in every post, but these were honest to goodness converstaions. I jumped on the chance to pull out that popularity speech I've had churning and fermenting in my mind since I graduated high school and realized it was all a sham. I can't wait to lay it on Emma when she's old enough. Can you tell I wasn't popular?

Sara said...

That is the exact scenario my Junior High days were full of, and that is one of my thousands of reasons for wanting to homeschool my kids! What a crazy day!

Diana said...

The more times you give the speech now, the better it will be when you deliver it to Emma. Although she will be smart AND popular...that can happen in high school these days, right?!

Ed and Bel said...

On my comment above I meant to say, “That was funny” not “The was funny.” My wonderful prove reading skills were at work for that post. =)