Halloween '09

Thanksgiving Checklist

Cute new shoes I'm sure the pilgrims would have worn had they had access to a Kohl's - CHECK!






A dish to bring - CHECK!

http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2009/06/the-best-spinach-salad-ever/


An in-town husband - CHECK!





A superhero/clown/lasso wielding cowboy - CHECK!





An 8 year old - CHECK!





Skewed depth perception due to a scratched cornea - CHECK!





An empathetic family - CHECK!





My very own "Mad Eye" Moody eyeball - CHECK!





A thankfulness that by Sunday I will have stopped putting my pants on backwards and running into walls - CHECK!

Grab a pair of pencils and start jammin

Asher's favorite YouTube video -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mR0tzt9XaM

Anybody got a sharp ax I can flash around?

Our stupid, worthless chickens have currently taken a hiatus from laying eggs. For whatever reason, the colder climate has them convinced they're entitled to some sort of sabbatical one gets after earning tenure. Time outs aren't working, nor are my stern looks. However, they have been molting for the past few weeks and have generously left their feathers strewn about the pen. Rather than being mortified by their appearance and hanging their beaks in shame, they prance around and mockingly suggest that I use their feathers to stuff a pillow for my sissy head. I guess laying eggs while exposed to the harsh Arizona climate somehow makes them hard-core and I'm some sort of house-dwelling mamby pants. I've decided to put the food dish on top of their coop. I will very much enjoy watching them flap their useless wings in an attempt to reach their daily rations - a perfect reminder that poultry = pathetic.

It's as if women's lib never exsisted

As I was driving down Mill Avenue yesterday morning, I came upon a sea of pink-shirted individuals with catchy phrases written across their chestical area:


SAVE THE TATAS!


I KNEAD MY KNOCKERS!


When did this happen? When did it become socially acceptable to refer to your cantaloupes as anything other than breasts? I'm at odds as to whether I think it's a very creative way to peak interest in the safety of my num nums, or a dumbed down solution to raise money in the name of milk jug research. All I know is that badoinkie cancer is serious business.

Giving Away

There are currently a few crafty items in my house that I've no use for. After dispersing what I can amongst friends, I've still got some left over items that are cluttering my home and mind. If you'd like any, please leave a comment letting me know which item(s) you'd like, and next week I'll randomly pick a number and make known who the lucky beneficiaries are. If you live out of state, I'd be happy to mail them to you free of charge (seriously, you're doing me a favor by taking them) unless you live in Zanzibar or something. We'll have to talk in that case. If I'm freaky enough to have lurkers, feel free to de-lurk.




I have two sets of Advent Christmas Stockings in various Christmas paper. Last year, every morning from Dec 1 to Dec 24, Emma pulled one off of a ribbon. On the back of each stocking, I had written an activity for us to do that evening (write letters to Santa, decorate the tree, etc). I'll provide you with the paper stockings, a list of activity ideas, and a set of mini clothespins.








This is my set from last year to give you an idea of how they look hung.








I have the VINYL ONLY for this board. I can give you instructions on how the board was completed if you plan on making one. You could always just stick the vinyl on the wall above where you hang your stockings.








1 FAMILY set of photo holder binder clips





1 FRIEND set of photo binder clips





1 cute picture of Emma as a baby







I have two sets of these laminated babies. They're perfect for little hands to flip through after you've exhausted your supply of fishy crackers on Sundays. I think there's about fifty different ads in each set. Each card is 4x6 (don't quote me on that).

Back to...

...having to leave the house no later than 8:28am in order to make it on time.

...eating a banana and toast in the car on the way.

...praying that I catch the green arrow to turn left.

...embarrassing encounters (like, say, being pulled over for speeding) with other adults that include me bra-less, wearing Clint's size 11 running shoes because they were the closest thing to the door.

...embarrassing encounters (like, say, driving into the back of someone's car) with other adults that include me bra-less, shoe-less because there were no shoes close to the door.

...frantic searches for my sunglasses to hide the mascara smudges around my eyes.

...school.